Random Embarrassing Situation

So I had an Obstetrics and Gynecology exam recently. It was one of those exams where they threateningly go "SHIFT!" every 5 minutes (or so they say-- it feels like we shift according to the time it takes a resident to yawn in between well.. shifts). As a result your brain goes into overload and fries itself until it recovers of course right after the exam and you wonder how you could have been such a moron to mess up like that.
So I go in all ready for action. I was going to do all that I could with the patient in the hypothetical 5 minutes that I had. I choose the first relatively high surface I find to begin writing on. I go ahead with the questions and the patient quietly says " Doctor, do you mind my stomach, please?". I look down in horror to realize that the "high surface" I have chosen is the pregnant patient's belly and not a commode of some sort. Then again, you'd think I would find it suspicious that there's a commode sprouting out of the middle of the friggin' bed. *Facepalm*
It gets even worse when she answers one of my questions by saying "this is my tenth pregnancy, I've had nine miscarriages". She then adds with a glare " I hope this one works out!".

Now, where's that dude telling you to shift when you actually need him!?